Establishing the Bridesmaids Relationship

Being a bride – as fun and fulfilling as it may be – can be very demanding. However, you can take a lot of the pressure off with the assistance of your bridesmaids. To start with, they will be your constant companion during your shopping and they will be your “co-plotters” to all things related to your wedding (especially the shower and the bachelorette party). Below are other things you can expect from your girl friends.

Bride and Bridesmaid

Help on the practical side of things

Your wedding will take a great deal of coordinating and even manual work, and your bridesmaids can help you in every step. They can manage your guests’ transportation, organize activities, make sure that everyone is accommodated, and attend to the light yet important matters during and around your wedding, such as directing people to their seats and arranging your gifts. However, do understand that they are doing this out of love, and know that they are not your substitute to a full-time wedding planner.

Simin, 24, tells of a difficult time she had when she was asked to be a bridesmaid by her secondary school’s best friend. She said, “As one of her few best friends, it was hard for me to reject her frequent calls to go through her wedding plans, especially during the months leading up to her wedding. But I have a full time job as well, and as much as I wanted to help her, it was affecting my work performance.”

They’re your day-to-day assistants

During the preparation and the actual date of your wedding, your bridesmaids should help you take care of yourself. They’re there to make sure that you are eating properly, taking enough rest, dressed appropriately at all times (including helping you with your wedding dress – a most important point) and generally making sure you celebrate your wedding in the best state possible. True concern comes from the heart, and it’s easier to stay on track with a group of besties supporting you.

Your bridesmaids are your soul sisters. Throughout the preparation of your wedding (and often even after that) your bridesmaids will be your most trusted friends. They will be your confidants and your advisors, the people you can go to for comfort and for laughs, and the first persons to share your anxiety and your joys. Your wedding will involve a lot of tearful, happy conversations, and they’re the ones to hug you at these times.

Nicolette, a 26-year old logistics executive, recounts how her bridesmaids were her source of support through the tough wedding times. “Planning my wedding was so stressful,” she said. “I’m actually not a very detail-oriented person when it comes to my personal life, so little details made me go into a constant frenzy. It was a good thing my jiemeis were only a call away, it helped to relieve the wedding nerves!”

It wouldn’t always be a party for them

Unless you are magnificently rich, your bridesmaids will probably have to pay for their own clothes, shoes and jewelry. Additionally, they would also still have to chip in for the bachelorette party, and even just the act of assisting you will take a toll over time. So, always remember to be nice to them, thank them for their effort and do something for them in return.

Rebecca, a 21-year-old university undergrad, had to make sacrifices to be a bridesmaid. She related: “I was having my year end exams during the period of the wedding, and it was not easy giving up those extra days of study to help my friend with her wedding preparations. But I felt that it all paid off when she gave each of us a handwritten card. It was all I needed to know that she appreciates all my hard work and sacrifice!”

Understanding your bridesmaids’ limitations and level of involvement in your wedding will help to reduce tension during the planning process. Know that they are first and foremost your best friends, and that they are taking time off their schedules to help you out. You may end up saving your friendship this way!

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