Being one of the oldest traditions, wedding has evolved through time and has various practices in different cultures. But a contemporary wedding, regardless of cultural background, has its own customs adapted to the modern times.
Here are some then and now in wedding etiquette to guide you on how to conduct yourself in a wedding as a guest, entourage, or the bride or groom.
White or Black Attire
It used to be unacceptable for guests to wear white or black to a wedding. White was inappropriate for a guest or entourage to wear because it was deemed to be exclusive for the bride. Black on the other hand was discouraged because it is associated to funerals.
However, these days, white or black are often seen worn by the guests or entourage. It is okay to wear these colors as long as they are within the bounds of the wedding’s formality, conservative dress code of a particular religion, or the time of day and location of the wedding. In wearing white, it shouldn’t look bridal so it must be kept understated. Black shouldn’t resemble a funeral attire but instead should be worn romantically festive with the right accessory or bright color accent. These considerations must be made before deciding on wearing white or black to a wedding.
As a guest, thinking of a gift for the couple can be quite a challenge. Most guests do not appreciate gift registries as they feel they are obligated to purchase only any of the listed items as their present. Some of which can be expensive and limiting. Traditionally included in the registry are household goods and linens.
But today, any gift for the couple is acceptable as long as it is useful for them. A gift registry is helpful for the couple and the guests to easily identify the practical options. She adds that the latest trend in registry is couples adding mortgage payments and vacations. According to Peggy, the guest has the prerogative whether to buy from the registry or not. And if you decide to have it your way in choosing a gift, be sure to do some research on what the couple will need and appreciate.
The Wedding Attendants
Traditionally, the bridal party is made up of some of her closest female friends and family. The groom on the other hand has his best male friends and family as his groomsmen. But today, a woman can be a part of the groom’s party and a man for the bride’s.
Peggy finds this doable as long as the roles of the parties be adapted accordingly. For example, a guy in the bridal party shouldn’t be tasked to help the bride get dressed; while a woman in the groom’s side can’t be expected to participate in the garter toss. With all the tasks involved in the wedding, the roles of the entourage are becoming more flexible for both sexes.
In the Family
It used to be that the wedding financier is the bride’s family. But today, the budget is split in many ways. The expenses are shared not just within the bride’s family but the groom’s as well. Some couples who are financially stable finance their own weddings. It is important for both families to discuss the expenses soon to be able to budget wisely.
Before, the immediate family members weren’t allowed to host a shower. It was considered as self-serving to organize a shower for a family member. But today, due to practicality for a visiting bride, family members from either side of the family can host a shower.
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