Cannot agree on wedding things

Jecca

New member
any brides face the same problem? my htb and me keep disagreeing on so many things about the wedding. it's my dream wedding since young and i want to make it according to my likes, but somehow our tastes don't really coordinate. how do you brides make decisions with your fiances? because if we cannot pull through this wedding period, then the years to come will be even worse! :unsure:
 

kellytan

New member
i find that wedding is the first step to learning about your partner about everything. learn to give and take, you will spend the rest of your life doing. it. this is only the start. all the best jecca. :)
 

meilingg

New member
It's common that sometimes some issues both parties will have some conflicts.
We have to give and take to compromise one another. Both parties wants the best out of the wedding and have different expectations.

Having all these conflicts and solving it will also build up the bond and understanding too =)
 

abigail

New member
Hi! I believe it's all about learning how to compromise things. In any relationship, both parties should give and take every once in a while. One should learn how to adjust with the other. And yes, organizing your own marriage is also one way to get to know your partner even more.

I hope you and your htb will be able to settle those differences in your tastes. :)
 

peony

New member
it's your wedding and his wedding. compromise is the key in weddings. it's not all the time that your likes and his likes meet. in some points, you have to let his side "win". and one more thing, weddings usually don't come 100% exact to what is planned, no matter how much we like it. along the way, there will be changes and etc... :)
 

Tenshi

New member
any brides face the same problem? my htb and me keep disagreeing on so many things about the wedding. it's my dream wedding since young and i want to make it according to my likes, but somehow our tastes don't really coordinate. how do you brides make decisions with your fiances? because if we cannot pull through this wedding period, then the years to come will be even worse! :unsure:

Hi Jecca

As you mentioned its YOUR dream wedding since young and you want to make it according to YOUR likes ..... my dear you might like to think as its OUR dream wedding and to both OUR likings ....

Basically both have to try to give and take .... some of the things he needs to give in to you and some of the things you need to give in to him. COMPORMISE is the key word la ... If both cannot compromise on each other preference then choose another nutral choice instead lor.

All things will voice down to having both of you being happy on that day and the days after!!

If not hor .... you can do agreement on somthing like .... you make the choice of which hotel and he make the choice of food lor .... so individually you guys will be in charge of different things then will not clash lor....

Just bear in mind that marriage = 2 people

Anyway I did not managed to wear my dream wedding gown (cause I cant find it at all), did not really have my dream wedding .... but I can still say I am very happy on my wedding day (and of course still feeling happy after getting married for 6 months). Realising that acutally its those people who's around you (be it the helpers and those who make an effort to attend your wedding) that really make your day on our wedding day.

All the best :)
 

cinnamonpie

New member
i don't think that not being able to settle or compromise different tastes should be a reason for us not pushing through with a wedding. i mean, we are all different from one another. and in a wedding, there are really some aspects that you should give way to his preferences. at the same time, he should also give way to your preferences in some other aspects.

after all, weddings can't be absolutely perfect. there might be "problems" when we go along the wedding preparation stage. and on the big day, "problems" might also come our way. but, let us not see this "problems" as mishaps. instead, let us see them as "memories". :)
 

huixian123

New member
for my case, infact if i would be happier if i were to be in your shoes like my partner and i cant agree on things.

well, now we have to please my man's mum. its like her wedding and not ours.
 

Woody

New member
for my case, infact if i would be happier if i were to be in your shoes like my partner and i cant agree on things.

well, now we have to please my man's mum. its like her wedding and not ours.

huixian, sorry to hear that. i hope things will turn out well.

i used to think preparing the wedding with your partner is fun. but its not at all. problems starts arising when we need to decide for the venue. we are suppose to settle at GCW for our wedding but HTB is looking at a new hotel which will only be done up in April'13. i dont wish to commit to the new hotel as i have not seen the actual ballroom.

we argued for a few days and i think he decided to go with my liking. but i dont feel good at all.
 

Brayan

New member
When you get married with anyone than you have a person behind you that will support you when you are in problem.And also you share many things with that.And you know what he/she can sacrifice for you.I think you will know a person fully after marriage.
 

moonlite88

New member
As what the others above had said, you have to give and take. After all,you are not marrying alone. You also have to consider his liking. It's also his marriage, he also have his own "dream wedding". If you were to argue over this, you will have more to argue in future.
 

xhenrietta

New member
I also have my own dream wedding, dream house. It's easy to have your own idea when you are alone. But since you and htb are together. You have to give and take, be more realistic too (my guy always said that)...Maybe you can come out with more than 1 choice, so he can choose...
 

Enigma1612

New member
" dream wedding are but just 1 day" ultimately whether the wedding last is still effort to maintain. its abt managing the cost, expectations, and most importantly enjoy that day and have blessings from parents n friends.. quarrelling is a phase, it will pass but the one sleeping next to you for the next 20yrs or so is the next important consideration. Learn to live w second choice, negotiate for common interest and aim for tis.. i leave it to you to win n we look at other items worth considering to have higher budgets. if its not a we thing but a I thing. then best to stay single. then u could plan things quickly as mentioned Alone w more control
 

kirae

New member
I think it's pretty normal to disagree on things especially if it's your wedding you're planning but the most important thing is to listen to each other and compromise.

:D
 

oreofudge

New member
the only that both of you needs to do is to learn to listen to each other. that way, you'll begin to understand and perhaps appreciate the opinion of the other. :)
 

coffeetea

New member
This is very common especially in dealing with wedding preparations. My husband and I used to get into misunderstandings and quarrels because of matters regarding our wedding. Thankfully, everything was a success.
 

maybellanne

New member
hahaha. that's normal. while planning our wedding, my husband and i quarrel a lot. thankfully, we have this rule that we don't end the day without resolving our fights so it worked out in the end.
 
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