Hi brides, my fiance just proposed to me today. However I'm having some doubts about marrying him because throughout the 3 years of our relationship, we keep breaking up and patching up again and again.. i can feel that he really loves me but I'm just so tired of this roller coaster. I said yes to him but i think it could be because of the pressure in the room, everyone expects you to say yes, isnt it? Sigh, i really don't know.. any advice from brides here? :blushing:
Keep on patching and breaking up
- Thread starter melo
- Start date
Hi melo,
Well i don't want to discourage you but maybe you should examine the reasons behind those patching and breaking. Is it to do with principles? or just bad temper? Are they always the same issues? I personally went through that, so I can't say its a good sign......
Good luck!
Well i don't want to discourage you but maybe you should examine the reasons behind those patching and breaking. Is it to do with principles? or just bad temper? Are they always the same issues? I personally went through that, so I can't say its a good sign......
Good luck!
that's tough.
guess both of you have to sit down and talk about these issues.
marriage is a life time, not a game so have to think twice...
make sure both of you are willing to hold hands and walk thru the rest of your life.
I'm sure if both of you are sincere to have a future together, both of you will compromise one another.
Conflicts happens within couples. Just the matter of compromising one and other, but in a good way thou.
guess both of you have to sit down and talk about these issues.
marriage is a life time, not a game so have to think twice...
make sure both of you are willing to hold hands and walk thru the rest of your life.
I'm sure if both of you are sincere to have a future together, both of you will compromise one another.
Conflicts happens within couples. Just the matter of compromising one and other, but in a good way thou.
Constant break and patch are not good signs already. Shows your relationship isn't stable.
If old problems keep resurfacing then it's no good cause it shows that problems not resolve
Dun because of your age or the duration of the relationship that cause you to hold on to it
You never know what's going to happen next in your life.
If old problems keep resurfacing then it's no good cause it shows that problems not resolve
Dun because of your age or the duration of the relationship that cause you to hold on to it
You never know what's going to happen next in your life.
agree with cryoaz and meiling, it's a really hard situation. I know how it feels, I have friends in the situation also, who after many years of dating suddenly broke up. the good news is that they managed to find another guy after that. Don't give up, but if you keep quarreling with that person, it could imply underlying issues. Talk to a pre-marriage counsellor, you will find some answers. 
Melo...i went through similar things like you before..break patch break patch.... quarrel quarrel old problem keep getting dig up... never ending....during that time the thoughts were if give up already where to find another one?
It's tiring...till it reach my limits i told myself if this time breakup again that's it no more patch up.....and after breakup he ask for patch back i told him you will change your mind again....and i know the same problem will arise again and again.
Now think back i know i make the right decision, cause we are not compatible. If we are, wouldn't have so much problems already.
Yes love is blind. I guess you yourself knows it best...
It's tiring...till it reach my limits i told myself if this time breakup again that's it no more patch up.....and after breakup he ask for patch back i told him you will change your mind again....and i know the same problem will arise again and again.
Now think back i know i make the right decision, cause we are not compatible. If we are, wouldn't have so much problems already.
Yes love is blind. I guess you yourself knows it best...
Hi cryoaz, comforting to know that someone has been through it before. :wub: I'm not getting any younger also, he has been promising that he will change each time i point out to him his flaws. I guess to me it's the heart that counts, just that i'm getting tired of it and I don't know whether I should stay on or move on.
hmmm.. 1st thing when he propose to u what is in ur mind? hw do u feel? that is the real answer in ur heart. if u feel doubtful, fear, worries, then maybe i guess u should ask urself if he is the one for u.. dun wait till married then regret then it is too late.. maybe u should tell urself.. choose someone NOT u can live with.. but Someone U CANT LIVE Without! God Bless u!
julieswong
New member
i guess it depends on what are the issues you are really facing in the relationship.. what are the causes of both of you breaking up previously? try to talk to your SO about these issues and resolve it.. cos these issues will keep resurfacing even in your marriage next time!
you can read this article, it's very good. i think all brides face this one way or another. pre wedding jitters
ohhh im sad- say yes because you love him and accepted him-
nice article- ive read through perfect for situations like these
great article! thanks!
WeddingCupit
New member
Your can try and give each other a 'timeout' and talk about the problems together and solve them in a calm mind. The biggest question should be whether you feel happy with or thinking of him. Being together for life is not easy as there will be more obstacles ahead. Both of your must be mentally prepared for living together, if not, its better to drop the idea of marriage until the time is right